Absent Minded

MyMan often accuses me of 'making it up' when I tell him that he shouldn't use the kitchen sink when his hands are filthy. Butto only use the kitchen sink to wash his hands if he has 'clean hands' and is about to prepare food. He only gets himself cereal or a hot drink so its not as if he regularly works in the ktichen. But it seems the kitchen sink has a real attraction for him.

I tell him it is not a sink for washing hands after messing about with dirty pots in the garden, refilling bird feeders or other similar filthy tasks. He assures me he doesn't; he uses the cloakroom. I know he often 'forgets' to do so. He denies it. So I follow on behind and clean the taps and the swivel spout he touched with dirty hands. He has a stomach upset often; so I try to maintain the highest degree of cleanliness in the kitchen.

Today I heard him use the toilet. Leave the cloakroom and go into the kitchen to wash his hands. I immediately asked why. He said he hadn't. I told him I heard and know that's what he'd done. He thought for a while and finally agreed. He hadn't realised; didn't know why he came out to the kitchen; thought it was because he was probably thinking of something else.

I know that he is incapable of multi tasking but next time he walks passed the bathroom or cloakroom to use the kitchen sink I intend to go into nagging mode. BIG TIME. I've moved the hand wash out of the way - hopefully it will give him pause to wonder why. And I've erected a big notice "this sink is not a washbasin: it's for Cook's use only".

Homework on Positive Thinking

I am still trying to get MyMan to read this author's book on "How Your Mind Can Heal Your Body". I'm finding trying to motivate him a bit of an uphill struggle. He says he feels 'too ill' to read it. I'm not 100% myself as I feel a bit tired and run down. But I'm hoping he'll start to read it before his next appointment with the physiotherapist. There doesn't appear to be any lessening of pain after the injections of local aneasthetic down his spine last Friday - 13th November. I know he is disappointed. We both are.

Meanwhile I will show him this video interview to see if it intrigues him enough to want to look at the book . .

Negatively Positive

MyMan attended physio yesterday. He really dislikes having to go to the hospital 2 days running. He has another appointment with the physio in 2 weeks when she will assess his muscle strength and tone. He is being booked in for a Coping with Pain Programme which will start in the New Year. He'll be shown ways in which in can get up from the floor in and out of chairs/bed etc. Also exercises to improve posture and increase flexibility in back muscles.

She told him that he needed to be more positive in his outlook. That his negativity would not help him. I almost said "I told you so" but I refrained. I told him that I had a book and we could look at it and work on change of attitude as an exercise together. He "will give it a try" . . .

I'm trying to train him like a child or a dog. When he is in a reasonable mood and less negative I remain with him longer. As soon as he becomes grumpy, negative or aggressive I quietly withdraw and do my own thing - alone. He prefers to be with me so hopefully he'll make the connection at some point.

They say you can't teach an old dog new tricks but I'm hoping I can teach and old codger new behaviours . . .

Positively Negative

He feels so ill MyMan. His symptoms are so wide ranging and varied. A few of them are: fatigue, breathlessness, palpitations, sore throat, swallowing difficulties, extreme tiredness, indigestion, constipation, dire rear, back pain, neck pain, trembling, weak leg muscles, headaches, deafness, loss of balance, blurred vision, voracious hunger or loss of appetite. Moods swings and memory problems have been well talked about in older posts so I wont go over those again.

At the moment he is 'twitchy' and anxious. I know some of it is due to his concern that he will be 'unlucky' in that the injections into his spine will not work. Or worse, that something will go wrong and he'll be worse off than he is now. He is convinced that nothing will go right for him. I try to suggest that his negative attitude will not help him. That there is every chance he'll be pain free after the injections. The doctor told him it could last for months. But it all appears to fall on deaf ears. He goes for the procedure on Friday.

I'm trying to visualise a positive outcome. I'm working as hard as I can. I need to in order to overcome his negativity.