Thursday, 17 December 2009

Just When You Think It Can't . . .

Just when you think it can't get any worse than last year . . . it does.

MyMan is, understandably, very disappointed that the injections of local anaesthetic in his spine provided no pain relief. Therefore the idea of the procedure to 'burn off the nerve endings' is a non-starter. He is being put on the waiting list for an injection of local anaesthetic and steroid injections into the sacroiliac joints. To see if that will help.

Physiotherapy exercises are making him feel worse. He is slowly noticing a slight increase of flexibility. But as a result of the exercises the pain is even more intense. He is finding it more difficult to cope with just the very basic of daily living activities. Needless to say his depression is worse.

We both feel intensely disappointed. Christmas will be very quiet. No decorations. No partying. Not even an afternoon tea party. As is usual, when MyMan is depressed and unwell, I am bone weary tired. My own aches, pains and stiff joints have flared up. I'm not going to put myself under pressure. So we'll spend a long quiet weekend together. Reading and watching TV.

I can understand that when we believe that 'this is it' we slowly adjust; get used to the limited lifestyle. But with the idea of a pain free mobile spouse I had allowed my hopes to rise. I started to believe that we could get out and about together. To enjoy visiting some of the local tourist sites; of taking a trip to see family. Dashed hopes are hard to bear.


maz said...

Oh hunny, I know how you feel. It's so true, once hopes are raised again, it's so very hard to cushion yourself from the hurt when things do not go as planned.

maz x

Robert said...

Like Maz and yourself, I have had expectations of a freer existence which never materialised. You'd think that after this happened several times, I would get used to it...but I never do. It really gets me down for a while, but after a while I do 2 things - make the best of the current circumstances and look for other ways to improve things. Life might never get much better, but at least I'll have tried.

Cranky Carer said...

So sorry to hear of your disappointment.

It's a real roller coaster isn't it when you think there may be light at the end of the tunnel and then there isn't.

Don't give up hope altogether though. The injections might give some relief. I know someone who did benefit from them.

Robert's philosophy is helpful I think. I feel you can feel proud of the fact thet you have coped so well over the years and keep on trying.

Cranky Carer