Thursday, 22 May 2008

Adjusting Matters

The Chiropractor told MyMan that she thinks he should look at buying an orthopaedic bed. I thought she meant firm. His bed is already hard as a board. It gives me back ache when I just lie on it for 10 minutes to chat to him before I go off to my little nest. He said she did say it 'could be that it is too firm'. He wanted a firm bed as he finds it very difficult to sit up or turn over in bed. He needs something to firm to lever on.

Ms Chiropractor told him he should look at an adjustable bed that will sit him up, raise his legs when needed and do everything but turn him out of bed. An adjustable bed. We had a peek in the Bed Centre in Honiton yesterday. It looks as if we'd need a mortgage to buy one. He was too stiff to try out adjustable beds - an ideal time to 'try before you buy', I would have thought. I didn't press it. Westpoint has a Disability Exhibition on at the beginning of June - I think that could be a good place to start looking.

I suggested an automatic adjustable bed last year but he refused - 'it's not necessary'. This is yet another example of his dismissing my suggestions. But as soon as one of his professional carers suggest it may be a good idea then he is keen to get on and do it.


rosiero said...

I do so feel for you and read your blog regularly. I think we have a lot in common (financial struggle/ being the carer/ doing all the household chores etc) for different reasons....your husband's situation is caused through no fault of his own by the accident and depression, whereas my husband has brought it on himself with alcohol. I think you are right to try to have some time for your self - in the garden or at bridge. If you were to go down, then he would collapse with you, so you need to keep strong. As for the housework, if friends object or in some way put you down because of the state of your house, then they are not true friends at all.

lady thinker said...

rosiero - how nice to meet you. thanks for your comment. I am sorry that you are experiencing similar problems.
In a way Alcoholism is an kind of illness itself and just like I am with MyMan, you can only help yours as far as he will let you. Until he recognises he has a problem and wants todeal with it then it will be a hard struggle for you...

My local friends are very good ... I'm sure they understand. It's more my long standing but distant [geographically speaking] friends who may be 'surprised' at my current level of housekeeping activity. I have to say it's all in my mind - I'm conscious that the spotlessness of my usual level is def missing and I am 'judging' myself through their eyes.. ... and yet if I went to see a friend and her place wasn't as spick and span as usual I wouldn't be judgemental. I am probably too hard on myself - but that is probably a reflection of my discontent with it not being as spotless as I usually like it to be.

Can Bass 1 said...

My word, those beds look frightening!

Merlin's Wizard said...

I too am a carer for my gandfather who has a spinal condidtion. I have found that if we badger our OT hard enough she usually gets us the equiptment. Could your local OT not get you an adjustable bed? we have one which is an air matress which moves randomly to prevent sores but the feet and head can be moved via a control pad. hope i have been useuful.

Merlins Wizard