Friday, 27 May 2011


After a rather dreary winter full of snow, woes and viruses I've returned to my Blog to fill you in with a short update.

MyMan has been no better. Pain and depression as bad as ever. Occasional glimpses of the Man he used to be pop to the fore but rarely last long. On my birthday in February all my family were flying from all corners of the world to converge on Sri Lanka for a wedding. I was stressed and anxious at having all my precious eggs in one basket. In the event they all returned safely. To provide a distraction at this time I booked a First Class train seat to East Croydon and a B&B at the Selsdon Park Hotel for along weekend in April.

I met with Kay who came down from east Anglia for a night. You may remember that Kay and I had a disastrous trip in 2008  Rather than terminate the friendship I continued to keep in touch but am now much less inclined to consider her feelings above my own. We are not as close but still able to enjoy each others company.

The main difference is that pre 2008 to give her pleasure I would have strained every sinew to  visit and stay with her. I find it stressful leaving MyMan. Would prefer to spend time away from home with my family rather than friends. But I would have made the effort. A 6 hour journey is no easy undertaking under the best of circumstances. So I am unlikely ever to make the effort to visit her again.

Over the last 2 years she has invited herself down to visit us. And rather than pay for her to stay at a nearby B&B I now leave her to sort out her own accommodation. I have forgiven but not forgotten. I am hardened.

During a phone chat Kay mentioned that we hadn't seen each other in 2010. I'd not been aware of the lack. She was trying to sort out if we could arrange a visit. I suggested that as I was on a visit to family while booked in at an hotel. Would she be interested see if it could a suitable venue for a half way meeting place. she did and we both arrived on the Friday afternoon. It was successful 24 hours together. We've agreed we'll try and fit it in on a regular basis. Perhaps a long winter weekend to include Christmas shopping trip to Croydon stores.

After Kay left on the Saturday evening I met very briefly with Merry Weather. She is a delightful lady. My only regret's we only had an hour together and I was inclined to be very tired by then. Sunday I spent the day with family. So I had the best of both worlds: Family and friends.

The best part was that everytime I phoned MyMan he sounded upbeat. I didn't probe and took it at face value. Time enough on my return home to hear of all the problems he faced without me. And the effort he made to sound cheerful. I told him how much I appreciated it.

1 comment:

karen said...

I too like being with family more than friends but do make myself go out with friends sometimes. I have found that going out by myself is enjoyable to if family is not around to go with me. Your trip sounds busy but fun. Hopefully you and your friend and enjoy each other again like old days but without putting you out. A friend should not be a burden but someone to make you happy. Your man was so nice when you called to check on him. He loves you very much and I am sure he missed and needed you greatly.